Children’s innate curiosity often helps them navigate “tough conversations” that adults might shy away from. Julia Livingston highlights the importance of rekindling this curiosity and offers approachable ways to bridge differences.
A Sixth-Grade Lesson in Connection
As I guide my three children through the school year, I recall a memorable experience my daughter had in sixth grade. New to the school bus, she chose to sit next to a girl sitting alone, who had brown skin and wore a hijab. The two quickly bonded over topics like family, music, and culture.
When my daughter—of African American, Caucasian, Greek, and Native American heritage—asked her seatmate about her background, the girl shared insights into her religious and cultural practices, including why she wore a hijab. She also opened up about feeling excluded by classmates.
Hearing this story at dinner, I was struck by my daughter’s curiosity and her ability to engage without fear or discomfort.
This kind of genuine curiosity has shaped my career, from roles in educational nonprofits and advocacy organizations to my current position as Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Manager at the Illinois Supreme Court Commission on Professionalism. Observing my daughter reminded me of the lessons children can teach us—lessons that apply equally well in professional settings.
How Curiosity Drives Connection
Every day presents countless chances to connect with people who are different from us. Yet, as we age, research shows our natural curiosity often diminishes, costing us cognitive and emotional benefits like enhanced critical thinking, confidence, and happiness.
Children don’t see differences as barriers but as opportunities to learn. My daughter’s seatmate taught her about culture, religion, and dietary habits, all sparked by simple, curious questions. Adults, in contrast, often hesitate, fearing they’ll say the wrong thing.
In the legal field, curiosity is a powerful tool for understanding clients’ needs and building strong professional relationships. As retired psychologist Dr. Leon F. Seltzer notes, curiosity fosters deeper, more rewarding connections by encouraging us to move beyond surface-level interactions.
Curiosity also promotes innovation, helping lawyers consider fresh approaches to their work and enhancing their ability to deliver better legal services. Moreover, it is linked to greater satisfaction, joy, and fulfillment.
Curiosity Enhances Cultural Competence
Cultural competence—the ability to communicate effectively across cultures—is essential for legal professionals. My daughter’s simple questions about her seatmate’s hijab and traditions were met with openness, leaving her more informed. Similarly, lawyers can use respectful inquiries to better understand clients’ backgrounds, build trust, and deliver tailored services.
For instance, when meeting a client who avoids eye contact or declines a handshake, lawyers should pause and consider whether cultural norms might explain the behavior. This awareness can prevent misunderstandings and foster stronger relationships.
To improve cultural competence, try asking:
- “What preferences or cultural needs should I be aware of to best serve you?”
- “Would an interpreter or specific accommodations make our interactions easier?”
- “How can I present legal documents in a way that feels accessible to you?”
Embracing a Growth Mindset
Children often embody a growth mindset—seeing challenges as opportunities to learn and risks as chances to grow. My daughter viewed her bus experience as a chance to connect, even at the risk of rejection. Adults, especially lawyers, often hesitate in similar situations due to fear of misunderstanding or failure.
However, adopting a growth mindset can yield significant benefits, from enhanced performance and motivation to reduced burnout and anxiety. As Jay Harrington writes in Attorney at Work, embracing the process of learning, even with its setbacks, is key to personal and professional growth.
Lessons for Inclusion in the Legal Profession
- Cultivate Genuine Curiosity:
Approach differences with the openness of a child. Thoughtful questions can lead to deeper connections and a better understanding of clients’ needs. - Develop Cultural Competence:
Respectfully learn about clients’ cultural contexts to build trust and broaden your ability to serve diverse populations. - Adopt a Growth Mindset:
Embrace challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, improving your resilience and overall success.
Creating an inclusive workplace and legal environment doesn’t happen by chance. By rekindling childhood traits of curiosity and authenticity, we can build bridges, deepen understanding, and foster meaningful change.
